Confession: I did not do a Christmas card this year.
I love getting my Christmas cards out each year. I love planning the family (or kid) photo shoot, creating beautiful images of my children and sweetie. I love selecting a killer design or creating one of my own. I even love tracking down all the addresses I’ve collected (in about five different MS Word databases) and printing off my envelopes. It’s one of my favorite things about Christmas.
I couldn’t this year.
My big girls were SO excited that a baby brother was on the way. But now that baby brother is in heaven I just can’t pose my family all happy and carefree and smiley and send out an upbeat, braggy Christmas letter.
Reality: We ARE happy. We have been so blessed, supported, and taken care of through our grief that our children have truly bounced back amazingly well. But yes, we still have bad days and I don’t want to gloss them over in a Christmas card. Plus, after writing all about Patrick here and here, I don’t know that I can muster the words to write about him again in a Christmas card. He is ours, I love him and am so grateful for those eight months I carried him. It is enough for now.
I did, however, make myself sit down and create a family photo calendar for next year. In doing so, I got to relive the fun, joyful times we had in 2011 and discover some gems that I’d not seen since I snapped the shots.
Definitely my new favorite portrait of these two. My big girls, the two that people always mistake for twins. Love them to bits.
And this one, the fiery personality in the family. Very opinionated and independent, this girl is going to do what she wants to do in life. I always joke that she thinks she is five–it’s very true. Anything Bailey and Natalie are doing, she will do.